Depression is real. And so is healing. But that doesn’t make the depression any less real and all-encompassing, no matter how much healing is done. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Today was one of those days for me - I did my work while combating the most negative slew of self-loathing thoughts I’ve had in a long while. Truly so mean and so unsupportive; my body was such an unfriendly home to myself today. It brings tears to my eyes to even think about it. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
While I’m packing these beautiful gifts and products people have purchased from me and my business I’m simultaneously questioning my worth and value and what I’m even doing and if any of it even matters. Speaking to myself in my mind as I’m wrapping these gorgeous and precious oils made by my own beautiful hands cursing myself with words of venom as if I were speaking to someone I hate! ⠀
The contrast was heartbreaking and also beautiful - there’s no other way to describe it.
Depression is real and so is healing. I sit here in process as we speak, moving through the emotions as I lay it all out here for you - inspired and empowered in my pain because I know so many people suffer in silence and don’t even realize the words they’re speaking to themselves are untrue. At least I do - and that’s why I’m here to share with you. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
It’s not even a choice; it’s a divine job and duty to be a lighthouse in the dark so you can know it’s okay to feel, and be, whatever in the world you are. So let the bad days come, my love - and the good days will multiply with each moment you allow yourself to process and feel without repress. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Depression is real and so is healing and I write straddling both hemispheres at this point in time already tipping into the light through the process of sharing and vulnerability alone. That's where the work is done.
Here to serve you daily,